I Believe

Just one more year...

What a beautiful weather we had today... And what a good day. Not so productive, but very pleasant in many ways. Spent some time with an old friend in the morning, chilled in the sun with a new friend in the afternoon, saw some friends I hadn't seen for a while at night. I was in a very good mood (and still am)... but as I said goodbye to the last friend I held onto her just for a moment... but when I let go, I suddenly felt something very strange. It was of course not the last time I see her until graduation or leaving Montreal... but then my heart kind of ached just for a short moment? As if I had a flash of how it's gonna feel when I'm gonna say good-bye for real.

And then it hit me, I thought: I wished I had one more year, or maybe just 6 months in Montreal.Who would've thought I'd say this when I came back a year ago?
I don't know if it's because that when you realize you are about to lose something, that thing suddenly appears to be more precious... But recently many factors got me thinking, and leaving this comfort I've come to enjoy in Montreal has become kind of scary. I cannot deny that for the last two years all I wanted to do was graduate quickly so that I could go back to Korea. Nothing seemed clearer... but now... it's not so obvious anymore?
There are people and things I find difficult to leave behind... unachieved/unfinished business I wished I had more time to get through, mentors I want to learn more from. Not that 6 months/1 year would change anything... and probably it wouldn't... but suddenly I realized I was had "people I want to keep by my side for ever" in my life and letting them go, or simply going away from them, isn't as easy as it should be.

I guess this thought was always in my mind. But for some reason I felt it in a stronger way tonight. Life brings you amazing little moments like this one when you least expect it.
I just want to enjoy every moment I get with those people from now. And I want to believe that it doesn't matter how long you've known someone, how often you see them, or how regularly you keep in touch with them... If somewhere, our hearts/minds connect... then when I meet them again, that moment will be just as special as the last time we saw each other.

I know, I really am way overboard emo...

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