I Believe

누구 덕분에 요새 잠을 잘 잔다. 핫티슈양 고마워.
Tteiuka. I don't just sleep longer but I really do sleep sound and well. I wake up fresh and somewhat happy despite all the stuff happening... All thanks to you. Even though our relationship may seem weird to others and even though it's been going at an accelerated pace in a very intense kind of way... me like it la. I'm comfortable. Recently has been hard on me, so just let me depend on you just a little longer. After that, I'll go full shape again and take care of you. I'm just kind of weak these days and your presence reassures me. Can anyone blame me for that?
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근데 우리 쌤은 왜 전화 안 받으시지... 바쁘시겠네. I know I shouldn't be worried about this because there was times when she was so busy and couldn't really be there but always came back at some point. I think I can only wait and see...
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I envy Americans in Korea. I mean, American-looking Americans or just foreigner looking people. Like if they can't speak Korean or they can speak just a few sentences, they'll have all those people over them saying "oh you speak so well!! omg! amazing (tears of joy)"... then if someone like me with a somewhat Korean face goes and speaks even at the level I'm speaking it now, then they wonder "How come that kid can't speak???? is she a second generation? or maybe a Chinese". It's kinda frustrating in terms of first impression... and even as we get closer it's frustrating. Once they know my situation, half of the Koreans feel pity and they're sorry they quickly judged my language abilities... Then they switch their discourse completely "Oh but you speak so well (considering you learnt from scratch)". Suddenly they play the foreigner card with me. Deep inside they're still thinking I am not so great though.... Sounds pessimistic and I'm sure there are people who tell me genuinely that my Korean is good (especially if they can compare it to what it was before, omg)... but I guess that's where my complex originated.
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