My mind is a blank sheet right now.
Or maybe there are just so many things on it that it turns into a chaotic mess that makes it look blank.
Wow. It had to come out someday but what a bad timing, what a bad way to say it, what a strange reaction. I finally told you how I felt, I thought you'd be weirded out, disgusted maybe... but you just didn't say anything for a while... and then it came out to this.
"Maybe you feel this way because we are away from each other. It might be the nostalgy... if so, it'll go away with time. If not... then I don't know what it is... It seems complicated."
I made you confused at a time when you didn't need any more confusion...
And I made you feel sorry again. I know you care about me, I just can't seem to show you how happy I am about this, it always comes back to me feeling sorry about myself for not being able to keep you out of my head. What should've come out as a simple and nice "thank you" finally came out as a terrible description of the pain I am going through at the thought of losing you.
I wanted to give you so much more and show you that despite an age, culture, education difference, there was so much that connects us. I wanted to be there for you the way I felt you were there for me... I always wish I can do that and I always fail to do so...
Maybe there's more of a mess in my head than I thought...
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